I’m not sure why when we see a giant replica of something that we need to hurry ourselves and stand by it. Like the original artist thought “I KNOW! I’LL MAKE A GIANT VIKING OF THE FUTURE AND THAT WAY… PEOPLE CAN THROW UP A PEACE SIGN BY IT!” … no sir. Admire it, don’t become ‘a part of it’. I think this phenomnia has spread so vastly that it needs its own name. It’s now called “rock-humping” and with this new name. I give to you some examples of how the pros pull it all off. So the next time you’re found face to face with Paul Bunyon and his big blue ox ‘Babe’ you can pull out all the tricks and create the best rock-hump of them all!
Pun-Making
Clearly, this broad wants to point out how huge her vag is. That’s why she’s smirking as she stands next to a large cat. She is clearly taking this to put on her Facebook page to claim ‘I’ve got the biggest puss in the world! I even found one close to being as big but here I am next to it… so this is the proof!’ This is probably the most common rock-hump of them all. Males will stand in front of a statue in such a way it looks like they are having intercourse with a rock creature, or maybe enhance their penis size. But in truth… it’s just a picture. Your Rock-Hump has failed.
Group Activities
The next type of rock-humping is to gather up fellow lemmings and get them to do the same as you. This is probably the easiest to pull of because you could literally do anything. Have everyone stand on one foot by a rock that looks like a shoe! Act like you’re crying next to a statue of a girl doing math! Have two dogs fight next to Michael Vick! …Anything! The problem here is, 100% you look like a group of idiots. You send a photo like this to your mother for mother’s day.. you think she’s going to wave back!? NO! She’s going to frown and climb back in to her whiskey-hole again.
Pointless
This final type of rock-humping is where you do absolutely nothing. You have terrible posture and just stand around or by a statue. You climb up on the statue and give a cheesy smile. You kiss a statue (where I purposely put my balls days before…enjoy.) with TONGUE! It really doesn’t matter because if you’re aiming this low.. YOU really don’t matter. Avoid statues, avoid people, avoid everything because you’re probably bad at it. Bottomline you suck at life. If you find a photo of a friend pulling off a pointless rock-hump… shank them jail house style.
In closing. Rock-humping can be fun while you’re doing it but keep in mind you’re really just ruining some art with your ugly face and forever freezing in time how much of an idiot you are for all your friends to see. Some things just shouldn’t be rock-humped. Case in point.. this:
That about says it all…
