I would have never thought that I would end up seeing this movie as it had nothing to offer me other than robbing me of some of my hard earned money and an hour or so of my life. However something caught my attention.. a friend told me “A guy gets stabbed with a machine gun in the opening scene!” …this gave me an instant hard on and caused me to jizz in my pants. (except I don’t wear pants at work, but that’s another post.) So after using my student ID from 6 years ago I got my student discount and in I went with hopes of people getting stabbed with a machine gun.

I’ll state this, if someone promises you a movie where someone gets stabbed with a machine gun and the movie you’re viewing begins with a wide shot of a castle where people are hauling someone in using horses… the chances are slim unless you’re seeing the Time Traveler’s wife of anyone getting stabbed with a machine gun.   What I did get was a movie filled with rediculous dialogue that lasted the entire film.
I guess at this point I should state that if you’re worried about me spoiling a stupid movie like G.I. Joe… leave.  seriously.  spoilers sorta… a head.

OMG!

At one point in the film a member of the Joes (not to be confused with the average joe’s from Dodgeball) is about to shoot a helicopter from his helicopter, unfortunately the other helicopter was faster and we were given this Gem:

and then…

Akon is in the movie!

I really…don’t need to explain this…

Double Bubble

This is quotes from the movie screenshoted from Youtube:

24 Seconds Brendan Fraser

More Black Eyed Peas Than You Can Handle!!!

Throughout the whole movie there is tons of black eyed peas music everywhere but nothing was more fitting to the ending credits of this great film than…